Family · Pop Culture · Ridiculousness

Mombo- I Am a Bad Ass With a Lazer Tag Gun

Well here I am again at another birthday party my sons were invited to. I’m down with this one though. Why? IT’S LASER TAG! Have you ever done laser tag? Don’t knock it till you’ve tried it.

My oldest has had his party here a few times and I have loved every minute of it. See, I am somewhat competitive. No, scratch somewhat; I am competitive. Don’t think we can still be friends if I lose Monopoly. Should I have an “off day” and lose Monopoly, you are no longer my friend. It’s the law of nature. Ok, that’s going a little overboard. You are not my friend at least during my internal, adult meltdown about losing.

My goal was to be #1 during all laser tag missions. Period. Sadly, with the alter ego name of Avenger; I would usually rank #14 out of #15. This score was just slightly higher then the adorable 2 year old that went into laser tag with her vest touching the ground.

I knew I had a problem when to rack up additional points, I began shooting the 18 month old my good friend was holding so he wouldn’t get trampled. From a distance my sister looked over (we were on the same team) and quickly put a stop to this.

“What is wrong with you? This is a baby. Your shooting a baby.”

“It’s all fair game S. If anyone walks into the chamber, they are vulnerable to my attack.”

From the lights that made everything white glow, I could see her roll her eyes and return back to her base obviously not following my logic.

‘We can’t be weak here.’ I said to myself.

After walking away from the baby, I returned back to a hiding place I had found on the upper level. After just a few minutes I felt my vest go dead. Someone had shot me. I turned around to find an adorable little 6 year old with a gun smiling at me, clearly proud of what she had done. I forced a fake grin and turned back around, awaiting for my vest to turn on again. You couldn’t shoot people until it went live. After about 10 seconds it came back on but again went dead. I turned around to find the same little girl, still smiling at me. ‘Oh my God.’ I thought. I am the baby now.

“Ok sweetie, you got me. Run along and get more people,” I said trying to remain calm. She did not. She just stood there. I began to stare at her. We were going to have an old fashion shoot out. Slowly I lifted my gun to her flux capacitor, or whatever they called the thing on the vest and waited for my vest to turn on again. I had one eye closed while I aimed with the other. The vest went live and BAM her vest went dead. She frowned at me and quickly ran away. ‘Yeah, that’ll teach you to disrespect your elders,’ I thought.

Fast forward to this party and I’m pissed. It’s so busy I don’t get to play. I wore my tennis shoes, had a rubber band for my hair and was ready to kick ass. I just sit here sulking, writing this up.

So what about you? You ever play? Are you competitive when it comes to games? My next combat mission I want to try paint ball. I’ve never been but heard it’s fun.

25 thoughts on “Mombo- I Am a Bad Ass With a Lazer Tag Gun

  1. I have a love/hate relationship with lazer tag. I love playing it! Its so much fun to run around and shoot people in a non-violent way. But I SUCK at it. I am horrible. I am always close to the bottom. The last time I played, I started sucking before even walking into the building. In the middle of winter, stepped in a puddle so my boot was soaked through to the sock, then my boot slipped off the icy curb and I went down, smashing my knee on the curb in front of my friends, the boy I was crushing on at the time, and his new gf….

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Jesus! That must’ve been the universe telling you that you should go home in lieu of playing laser tag. This is why I always say if irony had a job, he would be a comedian. That would’ve never happened if he was not standing in front of you.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Gah the universe can be so mean some days huh?! lol I guess I have learned my lesson. I think you are right, it would have never happened if he wasn’t in front of me. My mind was on his gf “gah great…SHE’S here….” BAM eating sidewalk

        Liked by 1 person

  2. I’ve never done lazer tag but my son’s been to a few parties. He loved it. Paintball… years back I did this with a group from work. I wore a protective vest but I still got bruised in other places. It hurt so much! It was fun but I have no desire to ever do it again!

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Competitive? Moi? Ask my daughters … they bear the scars 😀 I love that you took revenge on the 6 year old. She had it coming and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise 🙂


  4. I used to love laser tag (and paintball) … but sadly I’m out of shape and want to do “other” things.

    Have YOU played paintball? A must if you like laser tag … it’s even more adrenaline surging! Don’t worry about being hurt about paintball … just wear your protective gear and LAYERS of clothing. I never got hurt. The worst thing that happened is that my heart almost jumped out of my body!!!!

    Liked by 1 person

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